You are the type of person who leans toward the frugal end of the spending spectrum, the extremely frugal end. Family and friends never, never, never ask you for a loan. Today, you are likely to spend a great deal of time lost in your local discount super center wanting to buy either a pair of designer sunglasses or looseleaf notebook paper. Be on the lookout for slow moving vehicles with darkened windows. You should consider shopping at stores or businesses beginning with the letter E, but do not buy any products with a serial number or product code containing the number 094947. Your preferred shopping venue is thrift stores. Your special symbol is the comma (,).

As a Brown Pragmatox, you are down-to-earth and practical. You are hard working and industrious. You are frugal to the point that you might even refrain from making a purchase that you really, really need. Doing so often causes problems down the road. You definitely go with function over form and substance over style.

A tax in which the proportion of income paid in taxes is the same for all income levels. A proportional income tax exists if ever taxpayer pays exactly the same tax rate relative to income regardless of income level. A proportional tax is one of three alternations. The other two are progressive tax, in which the proportion of income paid in taxes is greater for higher income levels, and regressive tax, in which the proportion of income paid in taxes is smaller for higher income levels.

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I know word travels quickly among pedestrians of Shady Valley, but perhaps you haven't heard the latest. Pollyana Pumpernickel, the proprietor of Pollyana's Pet Palace, is no longer a pet proprietor. She's fallen on hard times, and fallen quite hard. Her husband of twelve years, Paul Pumpernickel has dumped her and their three young children to pursue insurance alternatives with Tricia Comer -- Smilin' Ted's sister and business partner in the All Comers Insurance Agency. Pollyana is distraught, to say the least. Paul Pumpernickel had been the dutiful househusband and caring father in his marriage partnership with Pollyana, but those duties fell onto the heavily burdened shoulders of Pollyana. The burden was too much. Pollyana's Pet Palace plundered into oblivion, leaving Pollyana penniless and jobless. Her only alternative was our government's public assistance program -- what you and I know as welfare. She's not pleased with her current social status, and neither, apparently is Winston Smythe Kennsington III, who ridicules poor Pollyana at every opportunity.
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