You are the type of person who doesn't particular care how something looks as long as it works, as long as it does the job. Family and friends never, never, never ask your advice about the latest fashions, and rightly so. Today, you are likely to spend a great deal of time driving to a factory outlet wanting to buy either a bookshelf that will fit in your closet or a birthday greeting card for your grandfather. Be on the lookout for celebrities who speak directly to you through your television. You should consider shopping at stores or businesses beginning with the letter V, but do not buy any products with a serial number or product code containing the number 815756. Your preferred shopping venue is thrift stores. Your special symbol is the comma (,).

As a Brown Pragmatox, you are down-to-earth and practical. You are hard working and industrious. You are frugal to the point that you might even refrain from making a purchase that you really, really need. Doing so often causes problems down the road. You definitely go with function over form and substance over style.

A political view that favors--(1) paternalistic government, (2) correction of market failure with government intervention, (3) equal opportunities for all citizens regardless of race, age, gender, ethnic origin, or planet of origin, (4) redistribution of income and wealth, and (5) regulation and control by government over the profit-seeking businesses of the second estate.

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Dr. Nova Cain, DDS, has her office in the mini-mall just north of city hall. You know the sort of mini-mall. It has a branch of Interstate OmniBank, Smilin' Ted's All-Comers Insurance Agency, an auto parts store, a branch of the public library, and four chiropractors.

Dr. Cain's location near the Shady Valley City Hall is most fortunate. One of my back molars is beginning to shoot sharp pains through my eyeball, into my brain, and out the back of my head. I've been meaning to stop by for a cleaning and check up, but, well, the thought of sharp needles and high-speed drills grinding away large portions of my teeth convinced me that other activities were more important.

Now, however, just as we're trying to trek through the complexities of the economy, that back molar has decided to throb incessantly. It's best if I stop in and let the kind and (hopefully) gentle Dr. Cain check it out.

Guess what? ROOT CANAL!
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